Just a bit of frustration I need to rant about. First off, I love haunting my yard. I've done it 4 years in a row and each year it gets bigger and better and I have a great time building it. I find myself going outside at night in my slippers just to look at the yard lit up. But, when Halloween finally rolls around, I realize that I am my own biggest fan. No one stops to look. What trick or treaters I do get just grabs the candy and moves on while barely glancing at the yard. Adults with their kids just usher by while giving me a blank look. None of them stay long enough to notice the fine little details I painstakingly include to make it authentic. And none of them have ever given me a compliment on the yard. I know I really shouldn't be doing it for applause but a little encouragment goes long way. It makes me wonder if I should just give it up. Anyone else ever feel this way?
ugh...no one cares
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Sorry to hear that. Post some pics and let us fellow haunters let you know how great you're doing. I agree a simple "Looks good" makes it worthwhile.
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I agree - it is very frustrating. I mean we all love what we do but a large part of it is entertaining others. Parents who walk their kids to the driveway then send them up alone to the door. A few times my husband was outside and told parents " you should go up to the door too and check out the stuff inside". This year we had many kids call out to their parents "hey, you gotta come see this" and that motivated some of them to come closer. Maybe it's jealousy - if they don't actually see it then they can play dumb when their kid says "Why don't we have a great display too?".
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Sometimes I feel like that. We had a little detail in the yard last night and I figured no one would notice. One teenager did though - double the treats for her. 
There's a lot of variables though. I know if there's lots of kids on the street, they can get really competitive - they're on a mad dash and don't even have time to look up before they're off to the next house.
The only things I'd say are...
1) Make sure you have things lit so people can see them
2) Sometimes you DO need to be your biggest fan. Nothing wrong with that at all. And I think any time you're putting in the tiny details, think of it as something you do for personal satisfaction, and if someone notices, well...that's just gravy.
But as bayoubrigh says, this ain't a bad place to share your work where people can actually appreciate it.
There's a lot of variables though. I know if there's lots of kids on the street, they can get really competitive - they're on a mad dash and don't even have time to look up before they're off to the next house. The only things I'd say are...
1) Make sure you have things lit so people can see them
2) Sometimes you DO need to be your biggest fan. Nothing wrong with that at all. And I think any time you're putting in the tiny details, think of it as something you do for personal satisfaction, and if someone notices, well...that's just gravy.
But as bayoubrigh says, this ain't a bad place to share your work where people can actually appreciate it.
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My family comes for my yearly setup and its a mix of a party and handing out candy in the garage. I was late putting the music on and some people complained ,"wheres the music?!" The music really helps get some otherwise fickle people in the spirit, we are all dancing away and kids out front are dancing, its cute.
So it was brought up many times that the tot count gets lower and lower every year and it was especially felt last night. I chalked it up to maybe lots of kids went to other places for parties and such, I got alot of repeaters but well under 100 people. I have a ton of candy left over
My family wants me to setup at my aunts for the following year because they have a ton of kids and they want my decorations to be appreciated more and to say "forget you, in my hood". Since the numbers keep declining.
I know they mean well and are thinking of me and want my display shown to the world since I know they are proud. But this is where my 2 cents comes in, for me, I do the setup mostly for my family. While I agree its a nice feeling to get some recognition from strangers, even a little bit, I setup for me and my family. If others dont show up, Ill just crank the music up and dance my butt off. When the tots come, I pop some candy in their bags, smile and keep dancing.
If you love your display as much as I think you do, maybe just think of it as for your family and the toters are just along for the ride, kinda as secondary thoughts. Plus, share your pics and videos with is on here, we love to look at all the details and well understand the hard work and talent that goes into such things.
So it was brought up many times that the tot count gets lower and lower every year and it was especially felt last night. I chalked it up to maybe lots of kids went to other places for parties and such, I got alot of repeaters but well under 100 people. I have a ton of candy left over
My family wants me to setup at my aunts for the following year because they have a ton of kids and they want my decorations to be appreciated more and to say "forget you, in my hood". Since the numbers keep declining.
I know they mean well and are thinking of me and want my display shown to the world since I know they are proud. But this is where my 2 cents comes in, for me, I do the setup mostly for my family. While I agree its a nice feeling to get some recognition from strangers, even a little bit, I setup for me and my family. If others dont show up, Ill just crank the music up and dance my butt off. When the tots come, I pop some candy in their bags, smile and keep dancing.
If you love your display as much as I think you do, maybe just think of it as for your family and the toters are just along for the ride, kinda as secondary thoughts. Plus, share your pics and videos with is on here, we love to look at all the details and well understand the hard work and talent that goes into such things.
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Aww, sweetie.
Every single year I go crazy decorating my yard and then for H'ween night I do the most intricate goodie bags ever. And we get fewer and fewer ToTers. This year we got TWO!
But I'll keep doing it...because I love it. I don't think I could not do H'ween. You say you love to look at your yard...it is bringing you happiness. And that's wonderful!
Just a word on people not mentioning your haunt. Kids get a little overwhelmed and sometimes adults can be shy. I can't tell you how many houses we've been to over the years where I left saying, "I wish I had said something."
So now I'm making an effort to JUST SAY IT. To heck with being shy! There's this one house we go to every year where you can tell they are just trying their guts out to make a really amazing haunt and atmosphere. This year (well, yesterday) I finally SAID, "You know, your place looks AMAZING. Every single year, my kids ask to ToT at your house." The guy looked surprised at first...then really pleased! I really, really think some of this is just a case of people not being used to basically starting up a conversation with a near-stranger.
People may be thinking (but not saying) about your house: "MAN that looks cool."
You might be making somebody's day and never even know it.
Every single year I go crazy decorating my yard and then for H'ween night I do the most intricate goodie bags ever. And we get fewer and fewer ToTers. This year we got TWO!
But I'll keep doing it...because I love it. I don't think I could not do H'ween. You say you love to look at your yard...it is bringing you happiness.
And that's wonderful!Just a word on people not mentioning your haunt. Kids get a little overwhelmed and sometimes adults can be shy. I can't tell you how many houses we've been to over the years where I left saying, "I wish I had said something."
So now I'm making an effort to JUST SAY IT. To heck with being shy! There's this one house we go to every year where you can tell they are just trying their guts out to make a really amazing haunt and atmosphere. This year (well, yesterday) I finally SAID, "You know, your place looks AMAZING. Every single year, my kids ask to ToT at your house." The guy looked surprised at first...then really pleased! I really, really think some of this is just a case of people not being used to basically starting up a conversation with a near-stranger.
People may be thinking (but not saying) about your house: "MAN that looks cool."
You might be making somebody's day and never even know it.
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We had quite a few comments, but the best was my neighbor across the street. They took their son out in our neighborhood which is plenty big, 1100 homes, and said that they heard people talking about it all over.
You have to think about what the average ToT and parental units see. Most houses its just a light on at the porch, or people sitting out in their driveway. There's a few here and there with some decorations thrown together. Maybe someone got an itch and bought a prop or two from Spirit at the last minute. An inflatable might be out in the yard. A house on every other street with a bag or three of spider webs pulled over the bushes.
And then there are our houses. People don't know what to think. I mean, in my brother-in-laws neighborhood they have one house that has a wishy-washy set of store bought tombstones, a strobe and a fog machine. ToTs don't say much, but everyone knows its the best house in the subdivision. And I still remember it from the last two years. The nephew and niece both insisted on going there this year my wife said. Did they say much to the people hosting? Probably not, but they remember it and wanted to go see it.
We might not get the verbal recognition, and really only people here can appreciate the details that go into the final product, but man we're making memories for children that might stay with them for decades. That's what got me last night while watching the kids coming up the driveway. They're in awe. We've taken something magical that they only see in movies or Disney World and put it right in front of their everyday reality. We've created a wondrous experience for them, even if they only get to see it for a minute or two. When they come to our houses, we get to create magic for them.
It makes me smile and it is why I'm already making notes for next year.
Don't lose the magic.
You have to think about what the average ToT and parental units see. Most houses its just a light on at the porch, or people sitting out in their driveway. There's a few here and there with some decorations thrown together. Maybe someone got an itch and bought a prop or two from Spirit at the last minute. An inflatable might be out in the yard. A house on every other street with a bag or three of spider webs pulled over the bushes.
And then there are our houses. People don't know what to think. I mean, in my brother-in-laws neighborhood they have one house that has a wishy-washy set of store bought tombstones, a strobe and a fog machine. ToTs don't say much, but everyone knows its the best house in the subdivision. And I still remember it from the last two years. The nephew and niece both insisted on going there this year my wife said. Did they say much to the people hosting? Probably not, but they remember it and wanted to go see it.
We might not get the verbal recognition, and really only people here can appreciate the details that go into the final product, but man we're making memories for children that might stay with them for decades. That's what got me last night while watching the kids coming up the driveway. They're in awe. We've taken something magical that they only see in movies or Disney World and put it right in front of their everyday reality. We've created a wondrous experience for them, even if they only get to see it for a minute or two. When they come to our houses, we get to create magic for them.
It makes me smile and it is why I'm already making notes for next year.
Don't lose the magic.
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HI, I'm from Adelaide Australia, Halloween is only just taking off.
But I get into it. We live an a fairly poor neighbourhood. I am the only one who does anything special.
So I got heaps of comments this year which was really cool.
Kids are starting to remember from last year.
I had a walkthrough. And I dragged all the parents into it as well. Had one single mum who wouldn't go through unless her son held her hand.
I actually had a couple of kids I tears. Is this a bad thing?
Here's a link to my efforts. I hope it works I'm a bit facebook challenged
https://www.facebook.com/ajax/share...[0]=208817539288901&share_source_type=unknown
But I get into it. We live an a fairly poor neighbourhood. I am the only one who does anything special.
So I got heaps of comments this year which was really cool.
Kids are starting to remember from last year.
I had a walkthrough. And I dragged all the parents into it as well. Had one single mum who wouldn't go through unless her son held her hand.
I actually had a couple of kids I tears. Is this a bad thing?
Here's a link to my efforts. I hope it works I'm a bit facebook challenged
https://www.facebook.com/ajax/share...[0]=208817539288901&share_source_type=unknown
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88 Posts
("...a hug if I may then, where aren't the young always so selfish in that way forgetful way, I mean they won't appreciate any of this perhaps till they have children in their turn where just then they might think back upon their childhood too, wishing to have said "thank you" at the time but you and I will be long gone by then I guess..." smiled the goblin sympathizing somewhat, adding "...no, you can never give back halloween to those whom you both loved and took for granted as a child, they're "gone on" now, but just instead perhaps, you can hand over their halloween spirit to those you love still, without expectation and remembering why too, where guarding the traditions is like respecting those who went before, thus you'd be doing it recalling those "gone on" within the custom of it, and then one day those children will remember you too perhaps with fond memories as someone "gone on...")
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Mfenske, now that guy is cool and nicely lit! Did you add horns to him or did you buy him that way?
Here's my take on numbers and kids. Neighborhoods change and as kids get older numbers can slack off. My parents neighborhood was like that as all the neighbors who's kids aged and ToT'd together left the nest. Mom said a few years back as they lost some neighbors the houses were bought by some new families with little kids and now she said this year she had about 20-30 kids. She doesn't decorate but still enjoys having the kids come to the door to see their costumes and smiles. Also if numbers are down just having a few families who regularly would come do something else that night can be a noticeable decline.
I think that most kids, my neighborhood included, just walk or sometimes dash in for a quick candy drop, without spending too much time looking at stuff. I will tell you from our experience, if you want kids to notice try your best to include an animated projection in your set up. Do it so it can be seen from the street. We had kids when they got to the door say that they liked it or made some comment about it (one little girl asked if we really had a ghost living in our house). Kids and parents were all standing out in the street talking about it--the Hallowindow's giant eyeball seemed to be everyones favorite--and once you have them taking notice something different is going on, I think they tend to be a bit slower walking up to the front door and anticpating what else might be going on at the house. One year the neighbor across the street caught me as I was going to my car and said she should be mad at us for taking all the kids. Said they all went to our house and skipped hers and she eneded up with lots of candy! We both laughed. That was the year with the Eyeball projection BTW....not scary but more silly and playful.
I don't think it's parents being lazy staying in the street. I think many kids want to do this on their own so don't want the embarrasment of having their parents right there with them all the way. It's their big moment of independence. Now some kids who think your house exudes scare, might not want to come up to your house so sometimes it's their parents who will say come on I'll go up with you. You can always post a sign at the bottom of the driveway "Parents welcome too!"
One of the nicest things that happened to us this year was an older kid on a scooter who made the point of coming up to the door to ask us if we were the house that had a ghost lady upstairs. He didn't want any candy when asked and clearly just came up to ask us his question, which showed kids do notice and look forward to the effort we put out. Maybe not all of them, but even one commenting can make your night!
BTW just like we need or want that little nice bit of recognition, don't forget to slow the kids down with taking your time handing out that candy and commenting on their outfits as well. Make their night too as they are just one in a crowd that passes by all too quickly into the night.
Here's my take on numbers and kids. Neighborhoods change and as kids get older numbers can slack off. My parents neighborhood was like that as all the neighbors who's kids aged and ToT'd together left the nest. Mom said a few years back as they lost some neighbors the houses were bought by some new families with little kids and now she said this year she had about 20-30 kids. She doesn't decorate but still enjoys having the kids come to the door to see their costumes and smiles. Also if numbers are down just having a few families who regularly would come do something else that night can be a noticeable decline.
I think that most kids, my neighborhood included, just walk or sometimes dash in for a quick candy drop, without spending too much time looking at stuff. I will tell you from our experience, if you want kids to notice try your best to include an animated projection in your set up. Do it so it can be seen from the street. We had kids when they got to the door say that they liked it or made some comment about it (one little girl asked if we really had a ghost living in our house). Kids and parents were all standing out in the street talking about it--the Hallowindow's giant eyeball seemed to be everyones favorite--and once you have them taking notice something different is going on, I think they tend to be a bit slower walking up to the front door and anticpating what else might be going on at the house. One year the neighbor across the street caught me as I was going to my car and said she should be mad at us for taking all the kids. Said they all went to our house and skipped hers and she eneded up with lots of candy! We both laughed. That was the year with the Eyeball projection BTW....not scary but more silly and playful.
I don't think it's parents being lazy staying in the street. I think many kids want to do this on their own so don't want the embarrasment of having their parents right there with them all the way. It's their big moment of independence. Now some kids who think your house exudes scare, might not want to come up to your house so sometimes it's their parents who will say come on I'll go up with you. You can always post a sign at the bottom of the driveway "Parents welcome too!"
One of the nicest things that happened to us this year was an older kid on a scooter who made the point of coming up to the door to ask us if we were the house that had a ghost lady upstairs. He didn't want any candy when asked and clearly just came up to ask us his question, which showed kids do notice and look forward to the effort we put out. Maybe not all of them, but even one commenting can make your night!
BTW just like we need or want that little nice bit of recognition, don't forget to slow the kids down with taking your time handing out that candy and commenting on their outfits as well. Make their night too as they are just one in a crowd that passes by all too quickly into the night.
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I appreciate you. ;-)
But let me be Devil's Advocate here. I have 3 kids. Sometimes the things we do with kids is completely engrossing and fun. Sometimes, they are disobedient little monsters, we are tired, ready to get home...whatever. Parents may appreciate what you have done, but they honestly are probably just trying to make it thru the night!
The kids will remember. The parents noticed. We don't do nearly the scale show that we used to do. In fact, I can set up my stuff in an hour and take it down in minutes. BECAUSE I have kids... But, it's still light years ahead of anyone in the neighborhood and the kids tell us that they look forward to it, and parents tell us they love it.... just not always on Halloween night. We had some neighbors move and tell us this year how much they missed not seeing the ghosts in our windows this year.
The point is...make sure YOU enjoy it. The day you don't, then take a step back.
But let me be Devil's Advocate here. I have 3 kids. Sometimes the things we do with kids is completely engrossing and fun. Sometimes, they are disobedient little monsters, we are tired, ready to get home...whatever. Parents may appreciate what you have done, but they honestly are probably just trying to make it thru the night!
The kids will remember. The parents noticed. We don't do nearly the scale show that we used to do. In fact, I can set up my stuff in an hour and take it down in minutes. BECAUSE I have kids... But, it's still light years ahead of anyone in the neighborhood and the kids tell us that they look forward to it, and parents tell us they love it.... just not always on Halloween night. We had some neighbors move and tell us this year how much they missed not seeing the ghosts in our windows this year.
The point is...make sure YOU enjoy it. The day you don't, then take a step back.
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OMG SO COOL. (skellie with horns) I may just be stealing that idea..............
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Many people will have no interest, many will never "Do" or "Try" for fear of failure or looking "Stupid" and unfortunately many seem to be educated to never try.
Rest assured that you DID SOMETHING! (And that you enjoyed doing it.) I know we all sure would like to have a compliment or a 1,000 every once and awhile.
It took me many years to be able to accept a compliment, but then I had to weed-out those BS-ers who compliment, take a breath and then ask for a donation or a free-bee.. "Was that a real compliment? Or a unskilled beggar's tool?"
Rest assured that you DID SOMETHING! (And that you enjoyed doing it.) I know we all sure would like to have a compliment or a 1,000 every once and awhile.
It took me many years to be able to accept a compliment, but then I had to weed-out those BS-ers who compliment, take a breath and then ask for a donation or a free-bee.. "Was that a real compliment? Or a unskilled beggar's tool?"
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