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312 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I need some clever names/epitaths to write on the tombstones in my front yard for our Hollywood themed party and I'm drawing blanks. The shorter the better based on the size of the headstones. I'm thinking just some sort of plays on words like famous movie star names? Marilyn MonROAR or something like that (only actually clever would be good).

Help? I have 6 tombstones

Shadow Crosser
741 Posts
I found this list of names and last words, either here or on the web:

Barry D'Alyve: "Let's Ski the Alps"
Hugh Cante: "I Think I Can Make It!"
Huey "Kablooey" Sagon: "There Ain't No Gas Line Here"
Ella Fant: "It'll Support My Weight"
Ben There: "I've Done This a Million Times"
Xavier Breath: "Do you smell gas?"
Friedrich Through: "I Know It's Lightning Outside"
Stu Pitt: "The Train Never Comes Down These Tracks"
Imus B Goewin: "I'm Just Gonna Wizz Here By the Fence"
Otta B. Alive: Sure, The Water Is Deep Enough To Dive"
Grr-amps: "The Power's Off"
Don Worry: "This Fuse Is Plenty Long"
Anna Rexick: "I told you I was sick!"
Claire Voyant: "I knew this was going to happen to me!
Anita Transfusion: "It's just a scratch"

I also have some latin phrases that I got from links in this forum if you are interested. Just let me know

Oh, and then there is the classic I see a lot:

Here lies Les Moore
Shot 4 times with a 44
No les, No Moore

312 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
I'm still working on this, and poking around the web today I found the list of all the tombstones in the Simpson's "Treehouse of Terror" episodes:

Tombstones - Simpsons Wiki

They're actually not as funny as I would have hoped, but they are the "length" I'm looking for, if that makes sense.

I like the "Grateful Dead" tombstone when next to an "Ungrateful Dead" one with some bones crawling out of the "ungrateful" one, otherwise I'm still searching for about 4 more...

Some other links to tombstone jokes in media:
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