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aka Halloweenqueen
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Discussion Starter #1
We have only received two RSVPS. One for yes, and one for no.

It's my son's 11th birthday party. We invited 11 kids. I'm at my wit's end.

We recently moved across the country and I don't know many of the kids he invited. Back home I would have felt comfortable contacting most of the families and asking their plans.

My son is telling me that most kids have told him they are coming. I hope so. My kids have been such troopers with the move. I know it has to be difficult for them. I really wanted his party to be a blast.

Now I don't know how to proceed with the party. How big a cake? How much pizza, prizes, etc?

Any advice? Should I send out reminders?
 

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Mourning Rose Manor
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I would pass out reminders and maybe just plan for the total number invited. In my opinion, it's always better to have too much food than too little. For the prizes, maybe just buy stuff that you can either take back, give to other friends/family members, or that your own kids would like. It's hard when you move to re-establish, but a Halloween party could be a step forward with your son making lots of friends! Who doesn't like a Halloween party? Oops - asking the wrong group LOL.
 

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Yikes! 5 days and not much responses....I think I would start placing those calls.....:eek: It's not fair on you to play a guessing game and try to figure out who's coming or not.....goodness! people can be so inconsiderate..you would think it was asking to much for them to RSVP???....:rolleyes:.
 

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The Halloween King
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Yeah that's a tough one. Especially moving so far away from home.

Good on you for taking it in stride, and more so your kids.

I would suggest sending out reminders, but in less than 5 days i doubt the chances you'd get many replies to them.

I'd put my trust...and blind faith, in that the kids who say they will, will come. But you know what over-cautious parents can be like these days.

Like someone else said i'd rather too much food than too littie, as i've had a couple times. Either way i hope it works out. Let us know.
 

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Ravenous Zombie
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Doesn't hurt to call. Either that or have like the other person said, enough food and drink for the total invited. : )
 

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I always think the more food the better because I make my family eat the leftovers like they are thanksgiving and christmas dinner we are often eating food for days after a party just in case I like to make sure I have tons.:p
 

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aka Halloweenqueen
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Discussion Starter #7
Thanks, for the advice.

I'll be glad when the party is over. I'm just going to plan for a full house and hope for the best.

I can't wait until I can turn my attention to the Big Night! :)

So what if I'm the only decorated house in the neighborhood. :mad:
 

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I'm in a similar situation... my daughter's birthday party is this weekend and so far we've only received one confirmation. In years past I've set up a haunted house for the kids but this year I'll probably just put out a few props. As for food, instead of buying pizzas for the party, I think I'll just invite family over early to eat. I can't afford to buy a lot of pizzas that won't be eaten!

Last year we had about 5 RSVP and at least 15 showed up. That may happen this year, but it looks like they'll just get cake :).
 

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aka Halloweenqueen
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Discussion Starter #9
What the heck is wrong with people responding to RSVPs?

My son's eleventh birthday party was today. He invited eleven friends. I received two RSVP calls with regrets. Two call for attending (three kids, on set of twins). Luckily we have a large family so parties always are full of kids so I wasn't too worried.

I asked my son to remind his friends to have their parents call. I volunteer at school and bumped into a couple of the kids and they told me they were coming. (I know, but they are getting older...)

We recently moved across the country and didn't know many of these parents. Back home I would have felt comfortable asking about the invitees plans.

The party was 11:30 to 2:00. At 11:40 a kid arrives. The parents literally drops them off and speeds off. This was one of the no-call kids, so I was hopeful that others would show.

No one else shows up. I have 8 pizzas and tons of extra food for one kid. At 12:45 the mother of the twins calls us and says she is on her way. Could I give her directions? The boys show up at 1:00. We are having a good time though, having a treasure hunt, etc. At 1:30 the other RSVPed child shows up. The excuse was the soccer game ran over or something.

So four kids total. Our of eleven.

At 2:30 the father of the first kid calls and tells me to "just tell him to walk home". I offer to have my husband drop him off, but the father refuses.

At 3:00 the last child's mother comes over and tells me that he looks like he is having fun, have one of my children walk him home.

At 3:30 I finally have the twins call their father. He comes a half hour later with the excuse that he thought his wife was picking up the boys because he had a golf tournament.

My son was a good sport. He was disappointed so many didn't show, but I think everyone had a good time. It pays to have a bunch of siblings around!

I can't understand how inconsiderate people can be. We have tons of food and favors left over. What's so hard about being polite and calling?

Thanks, glad I have somewhere to vent.
 

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The meaning of RSVP is probably lost. These days the redundant statement of "RSVP either way" is probably needed. People assume they need to call if they are coming, not realizing you have very politely asked them to respond to your invitation.
 

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Ravenous Zombie
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So I ended up meeting with most of the folks that were Maybe's yesterday at a meal. One by one, they told me in my face that they were sorry they didn't RSVP yet but they couldn't make it. I still have a good number of people coming, but I find that this group, if one couple doesn't come, that leads to another not coming, and it's like a domino effect. Same when they leave parties, one leaves, and one by one they go.
 

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Ravenous Zombie
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I know, it's a pain. Yes, he's lucky that has siblings too! At least the kids who were there had fun. I'm sure they'll look forward to next year's if you have it again, and spread the word to the others. You must be glad to get it over with, huh? We have a bash every year and it's a ton of work and it gets to a point where I can't wait until it's over and here. Weird, right? All those weeks of work for people to leave after 2 1/2 hours - most have kids.
 

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People who do not RSVP drive me crazy! I have posted this a few times for people to read when they fail to RSVP:

The Meaning of R.S.V.P.
From Donna Pilato

The Meaning of R.S.V.P.


Lack of RSVP's - A Growing Problem
I hear more and more often, and have found in my personal experience, that hosts often do not receive firm indications whether guests plan to attend their parties, even if R.S.V.P. is clearly printed on the invitation. This could mean either one of two things. First it could mean that rudeness is a growing trend in our society. Or, as I would prefer to believe, people no longer understand what the term means. Assuming the best, and that the decline in R.S.V.P.'s can be attributed to ignorance and not rudeness, I will clarify this for the record.

What RSVP Means
The term R.S.V.P. comes from the French expression "répondez s'il vous plaît", meaning "please respond".

If R.S.V.P. is written on an invitation it means the invited guest must tell the host whether or not they plan to attend the party.
It does not mean to respond only if you're coming, and it does not mean respond only if you're not coming (the expression "regrets only" is reserved for that instance). It means the host needs a definite head count for the planned event, and needs it by the date specified on the invitation.

Why It's Inconsiderate to Not RSVP
An incomplete list of respondents can cause numerous problems for a host including difficulty in planning food quantities, issues relating to minimum guarantees with catering halls, uncertainty over the number of party favors and difficulties in planning appropriate seating, among other things.

So the next time you see R.S.V.P. on an invitation you receive, please call your host and respond promptly.​
 

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People are SO inconsiderate! This has happened to me before. The parents think nothing of it. I have this one girl who calls all the time to play with my daughter at MY house. My daughter never plays there. Come to find out, we're a free sitting service for the parents. Sorry this happened to you. Your a good Mom to go to so much trouble!
 

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Pumpkin Princess I had been watching this thread & today read it out loud to all in my house.....now I have no kids but I cannot understand these kinds of parents that could do something like that to an 11 yr. old. Maybe the kids he invited did not pass the info along to the parents. I know we just feel so bad for you in reading this I mean its sad enough to read some of the sad stories in this section of the forum when all of us try to plan parties & we have such a hard time getting people to come or to commit or our favorite one that has to wait & see what else might come up......but to do this to a kid is just uncaring.

Muf
 

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I had 3 kids rsvp ( 1 from my daughter's school, 2 from the previous school ). About two hours before the party, one of them called to cancel due to illness. In all we only had 2 non-relative kids show up out of about 14 invites. Luckily family filled up some of the slack and we had a good time anyway... I'm just glad we decided to not order pizza and stick with just cake.

Hopefully next year will be better...
 
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