Thread: Is it rude to have an "Adults Only" request?

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Two of my boyfriend's ex-coworkers have babies. He also has a few friends (that I'm not sure we're inviting or not - haven't discussed the invite list quite yet) that have very small children.

I throw our parties for our similarly-aged friends (and myself) - not kiddies. Don't get me wrong, the parties I throw are perfectly suitable for children.. No alcohol, no dirty party games. Just good, old-fashioned, Halloween fun.

The thing is, I just don't really want children/babies at my party. #1 They annoy me. #2 They're gross. #3 I don't want their grubby little hands on all my stuff. I'm also worried that, with babies at the party, I'll be forced to turn down music/TV, turn on regular lighting (which I probably won't even have readily available).. And just.. I don't know.

Again, don't get me wrong! I love trick-or-treaters and it's a child's right to have fun on Halloween. I'm just at an age where I'd like to keep the children at bay until it's absolutely necessary they be around for holiday get-togethers. (For instance, when the majority of my friends have kids and we throw parties specifically for them, or have a place set up for them.)

Does anyone else have "Adults Only" requests on their invites? How are they received? Do people bring their children anyway, or do they just not come?

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having an "adult only party".... matter of fact it seems that there are more and more adult theme parties these days. It's your party and it's important for you to enjoy yourself without having too worry about children running around getting hurt, or getting in the way of things... you already have the job to host it ... no need to make it more complicated.
And that's coming from a person whose a fanatic for kids.

Each year we have an adults only party. We have two children & sometimes we have a party closer to Halloween for them. I don't think anyone should expect you to allow children there when you don't have children of your own. I don't think it is rude at all to say "adults only". I usually use a poem & there is a line in there about that (ie. live the kiddos @ home because it is too scary). I'll try & find the poem from last year and post it on here so u can see an example.

My regular party is an open house for my gym so I put "bring your friends - 18 and over only please!" on the invites. But there is a lot of alcohol and some things that just aren't appropriate for kids at my party. I want my party to be a time for adults to get back to that child-like fun that normally gets forgotten once college is over and they just can't do that if they have to drag their kids along. No one has ever complained or gone against my wishes. I do have a few people who can't get overnight babysitters and don't come, though.

Nothing wrong at all with wanting some adult social time and honestly, no one needs that more than the parents of small children so I think you'll be fine designating the party as "adults only". Heck, when my kids were little I would have done almost anything for the chance to sit around and talk to another adult. I say go for it!

I don't see anything wrong with your concept of an adult only party. To avoid hurt feelings, it's just a matter of putting the proper marketing spin on things. Halloween night is devoted to the kids (as it should be), with all the costume prep, chaperoning, and candy distribution that entails. But your party is focused on enjoyment for the adults, so that after all the obligatory things they need to do for the kids, they can still remember that Halloween is FUN. You're not excluding anyone - you're embracing the poor, downtrodden parent, and offering them the chance to escape for an evening. The glass isn't half empty, it's...well, you get the picture.

I agree with all the above.
After a few years of friends bringing their kids, (who then they had to entertain), they never really enjoyed themselves. And the kids were bored.

So I added a nice note into the invites, along the lines of,
"If you want to explain to your kids why that man has a sheep attached to the front his pants,or why the woman is wearing a string and dixie cup bikini, bring 'em along."

If they want to come to your party ,they will find a sitter.
Parents do NOT want to answer questions like that.....

I whole heartedly agree! Do what makes you most comfortable. Any adult with a child will understand. I have a toddler and she HAS to get her hands on anything Halloween in the garage! She even tries to cry when we won't take her into the garage to see the bats and ghouls! I think it's your party and you need to be able to relax and get into the spirit ... my problem is that adults touch my stuff, too!!!!! and I don't like it! :P

It's not rude to have an adults only party! It seems from your post that you only have a few individuals that have children - if this is the case, there shouldn't be any worry on your part - they simply need to find a sitter, same as any other adults only party. Babies and toddlers are a lot of work and the adults just can't truly enjoy themselves if they little ones are around - I'm sure your guests with children will understand.

A couple of thoughts...

Are you planning this on Halloween night (which is Sunday this year)? If so, adults with children may either (1) not come at all since they have to take the little ones out to TOT or (2) come late - which if it were me (and the majority of the population) have to work on Monday so I would probably decline the invitation all together.

Just my 2 cents.

We always include a "Sorry, but adults only!" statement on our save-the-dates and invitations... our house is not kid friendly, and I don't want me or parents to have to worry about them getting into something they should not. I tell all my friends with kids that, and most seem to understand and respect that. As long as they know far enough in advance, they can make plans for a babysitter.