Our neighbor's 9-year-old daughter has attention deficit disorder (ADD) so they let her do whatever she wants. Every year, she comes to our Halloween party and raids our big pumpkins and cauldron of candy. She literally gets a plastic grocery bag and starts filling it up to the brim. Her parents never say anything to her.

In addition to that, when she doesn't win any of the games or doesn't like the prize she gets (if she does win), she starts freaking out and crying loudly so everyone can hear.

How would you handle this situation aside from not inviting them? We invite all neighbors on our block so it would be awkward if we didn't invite them. Do I have the right to tell their daughter to leave candy for the rest of the party? She'll freak out if I do.

Yes, you do have the right to tell her that. To forestall a tantrum over the candy, you could prepare candy bags, and pass them out individually, rather than letting the kids help themselves to an open bowl. Not sure what to do about the games, though.

ADD is not a license for complete lack of self-control. My 10-yr-old has ADD, and I certainly would not permit him to hog the whole bowl, or to pitch a fit over something he doesn't like. (He has tried occasionally in the past, and gets removed from the situation when he can't or won't behave. He knows now that dog won't hunt. )

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Haunt pics: 2005, 2006

I agree, you absolutely have the right to tell here to leave some candies for the others... Candy bags is a great idea!

You could even try to explain the "rules" of the game beforehand (not too extensively as ADD kids usually don't have a lot of attention for a long period of time) and stress that there will be no crying / arguing / b***hin over the prizes and general aspects of the party. Tell the kids that, if they win and complaint about their prize, that you will just take it back and give it to whomever came in 2nd place.... Might be a little drastic, but she has to learn that you don't always get what you want in life, even if you throw a tantrum..... And if she gets to "out of hands" just ask your neighbors to take her back home.... This is your party, and you don't have to endure any of this.... Just my opinion...

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Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have!

Jello made with sleeping tablets
Possibly a game of mummies, where she gets wrapped in toilet paper, then left, in a corner, at someone elses house

Can you tell I don't like kids?

=]

LOL! That reminds me, we did do the mummy wrap last year.

Candy bags passed out to each kid sounds like the way to go. Anyway you can talk to her parents prior to the party (or is it they don't want to be bothered with having to discipline her? I'd understand if you didn't want to make trouble with the neighbors.) Short of saying something to her parents about them keeping control of her, or not inviting her, you might just have to risk a freak-out.

Unless you got specific prizes for each of the kids (rather expensive I know), or her very favorite candy/treat, my best suggestion is to try and ignore her if/when one occurs, and move on to the next game/activity. And turn up the volume on your stereo!

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