Thread: Be careful what you say....

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I didn't know where to post this, so I am posting it here. People have been taking issue with many comments(mine included) on this forum. Forum is defined as a medium of open discussion. Thus meaning that if you open up a line of thought you should be aware that others who use the forum may disagree or question what you say. This is in fact the exact reason for having a forum. A forum is not just a place for certain people to receive accolades for their work or for businesses to force their products on you. It is a place for all those who choose to participate to voice their thoughts. I agree that context is lost in the written format, but even if the context is wrong there is no need to vilify those who have a varying viewpoint. If that is how you feel then maybe a "forum" isn't the best place for you. Instead you can erect a shrine to yourself so people can praise you or start a forum specifically for your product so you can badger people there.

I may have been better off putting this in the humor section, but that is for Halloween humor. This is meant to be a commentary, but I am sure I will receive harsh words of criticism. Which is good, because it just proves my point.

Well what did you say to get negative feedback? You might of just taking it the wrong way like ya said translation and hands gestures and face visuals get lost when typing.

Originally Posted by Toetag

Well what did you say to get negative feedback? You might of just taking it the wrong way like ya said translation and hands gestures and face visuals get lost when typing.

I have to point out that I don't care about negative feedback. You just read that I wrote that forums are for open discussion. I know that what I say might elicit negative feedback. I actual like that people will say something other then praise, that way I learn and make things better. What I find disturbing is that people are taking offense if someone does say something that might not be what they want to hear.

Well its understandable that one doest want to hear the bad. I think as long as someone doesnt call someone flat out something bad about their race,religion,male or female or belittle someone then its ok. If someone doesnt agree with you then thats ok...Id just ignore it

Now this is just my opinion, but...

If I post a thread and ask someone's advice on a prop or something, I would not find it appropriate to flame (for lack of a better word) the person that didnt like my prop, and posted constructive criticism.

What would bother me though, is if someone posted a thread with a tutorial in it, as if to say "here, this is a gift for the group", and most of the group thanks the poster for the gift.... but then someone has questions that are not quite phrased like "help me", but rather more like criticisms and/or argument of content posted. In my opinion, no matter how it is worded, the context seems rude and unnecessary.

If that were the case, I don't feel its out of line for others to speak up, if nothing more than a show of support for the original poster, ie gift giver.

But then again, thats just how I see it.

If this is about the costume thing? If it were me costume or not they would get candy. Too many variables(sp) to understand why they didnt have a costume or not and im not here or there to judge anyone. Its Halloween Throw some candy

Originally Posted by Toetag

If this is about the costume thing? If it were me costume or not they would get candy. Too many variables(sp) to understand why they didnt have a costume or not and im not here or there to judge anyone. Its Halloween Throw some candy

No this isn't about anything in particular. I actually have never really checked out the costume thread. But, it seams like there are a bunch of little nit picky things popping up. Whether it is the chat, people making remarks about posts, what ever the costume thing was about and other things like that.

I don't want to argue with anyone. I just love having access to this forum and want to see it stick around. DISCLAIMER: OK EVERY THING AFTER THIS IS SARCASM I guess a solution would be to have the author of any particular thread get to read all the posts on the thread before they are posted for public view. They could pick and choose what gets posted, that way they don't have to have anything negative about their post end up being viewed. Or you could go one step further and there could be a panel that views every post before anyone reads it and that way no ones feelings get hurt. Or even better there could be a rule that unless you are paying someone a compliment or buying their product you can't post a comment. END SARCASM Or everyone could be grown ups and just ignore something if they don't like it. I will now take my own advice and will not comment on anything that isn't Halloween related. However I will voice my opinion when I feel it is appropriate in relation to Halloween matters and do so without guilt.

If they are responding to something that you wrote, good or bad, wouldn't that mean that they are enjoying the same "freedom of post" as you were when you wrote it? I don't understand.

You sound like you want to say whatever you want and everyone should instantly agree with you. Sometimes you just have to deal with responses from people who don't see things the same way that you do. That might give you the chance to clarify your opinion a little more.

PEACE AND LOVE, JUNKIE........peace and love.

One of the less-than-appealing aspects of a forum that's accessible to the general public is: you'll have to deal with the general public.

One thing that comes to mind regarding our HalloweenForum.com - there is no age limit (per se) to those who are participating, and all are entitled to, if not encouraged to, participate in discussion.
Additionally, there is no way to actually tell the age of someone posting, even if they've given an age in their profile (I know...I'm stating the obvious, as everyone is someone else on the internet).

End result: rather immature people, who don't have the mental / emotional armor to deal with criticism or even disagreement, see dissenting comments pointed towards them in these forums, and they lash out in retaliation...and sadly tend to drag a lot of people down with them in their flailing.

Larry (our wonderful host and site owner) has had the wisdom to NOT appoint moderators on this forum - I see that as a plus, since it keeps the rules simple: do as the owner asks, or they'll give you the boot. No one else need be involved.
The downside? There's only one of Larry, and he's a busy guy outside of this forum - so we, the participants, need to police ourselves.
That may include the more mature board members "sucking it up", and NOT getting involved in flame wars, forum bickering, or other shenanigans...

I mean really...just how bad is it to stop responding to some child who's afraid to admit they made a mistake of some kind?
(please note: "child" in this sentence has NOTHING TO DO WITH AGE)

Also remember: EVERYTHING posted on the internet has the potential to be FOREVER...so, choose your fights carefully.



Thanks for listening...this is Captain Obvious signing off to go rescue others in need of hearing what they already know!!

Originally Posted by yardhauntjunkie

I didn't know where to post this, so I am posting it here. People have been taking issue with many comments(mine included) on this forum. Forum is defined as a medium of open discussion. Thus meaning that if you open up a line of thought you should be aware that others who use the forum may disagree or question what you say. This is in fact the exact reason for having a forum. A forum is not just a place for certain people to receive accolades for their work or for businesses to force their products on you. It is a place for all those who choose to participate to voice their thoughts. I agree that context is lost in the written format, but even if the context is wrong there is no need to vilify those who have a varying viewpoint. If that is how you feel then maybe a "forum" isn't the best place for you. Instead you can erect a shrine to yourself so people can praise you or start a forum specifically for your product so you can badger people there.

I may have been better off putting this in the humor section, but that is for Halloween humor. This is meant to be a commentary, but I am sure I will receive harsh words of criticism. Which is good, because it just proves my point.

Far from harsh words of criticism, Junkie. I wholeheartedly agree with what you say, Although I don't really believe that there are many here who post our work just to obtain kudos for it or to drum up sales. The vast majority of members here unselfishly post to help and inspire fellow haunters. There are some seriously talented people on this forum and if I received constructive criticism from them as to how I could improve on a piece of work, I would gratefully take it on board. The forum is a place where like minded people can meet and exchange ideas for the common good.
Obviously there will be disagreements over certain things from time to time, but that, as you rightly say, is another purpose of the forum. However, one can disagree with something politely and with decorum and manners. There can never be any excuse for rudeness, slander and personal attacks such as I have seen on other (Non-Halloween related) forums.

Larry does a fantastic job to provide this site for us. let's help him by keeping it nice eh?