My first "real" backyard haunt was in 2007... it was basically a graveyard scene with a few extra props. However, the area where I live (near the entrance to the Columbia River Gorge) tends to be very windy in October!

I quickly learned that typical methods for erecting foam tombstones were of no use to me. The solution I adopted was to Gorilla Glue a couple of jute strings to the back of each stone, and then tie them onto wooden stakes. I often twist some vines or other natural stuff around the stake to make it look more natural, but the stones are mainly viewed only from the front, so it's no big deal.

That first year, I really only had a couple of decent props. I built a really nice crank ghost, but my early tests proved that she tended to fly horizontally instead of vertically whenever the wind picked up. I compensated for this by attaching some small lead fishing weights to the bottom of her robe. If the wind really picks up, I'll have to ground her, but fortunately she's been able to handle the conditions she's been exposed to so far.

My other 2007 prop was a simple scrim illusion. I made a wooden frame about the size of a screen door and stretched a tight-weave mosquito netting over it. I mounted it to an arched trellis just inside my yard, hung a lightweight robed monster under the trellis, and wrapped the back of the trellis in a dark plastic tarp. Then, I painted a little poem on the scrim, daring trick or treaters to pass through the graveyard for a special treat.

I mounted a spotlight close to the scrim pointing straight down onto the poem. After dark, the monster behind the scrim was completely invisible. Whenever someone approached and started reading the poem, I would flip a switch that turned off the spotlight and turned on a strobe under the trellis. This simple trick got some satisfying results.

Anyway, cutting to the chase... this year I went several steps beyond my simple graveyard scene. I'll be posting pictures soon. I moved the tombstones out into the front yard to make room for a black plastic maze in the back yard. I reused my previous props but also added several more, including a cannibalistic meat cooler complete with a live demented butcher, a cave full of spiders and striking (air compressor) snakes, and a crypt full of gruesome corpses and animated zombies.

My friends and I had a blast scaring the crap out of people, and the whole neighborhood has been buzzing for days about how cool it was. I really feel like I've raised the bar for myself in terms of what I (and my neighbors) expect for next year.

Here's the problem, though... the black plastic maze was a pain in the ass! We got it almost half done when the wind came up and tore it all down again. Determined not to give in to mother nature, we rebuilt the whole thing and were lucky enough for it to last through our annual pre-Halloween party and Halloween night. However, right after Halloween, the wind came up again and tore it all to shreds.

So, I'm trying to rack my brain for ideas about how I can make next year every bit as spectacular as this year's maze, without having to go to the trouble of putting up an entire maze. I might be willing to put up a wall or three, but I really don't think I'm going to be up to fighting the elements to put up something that elaborate again, just to risk having it torn to bits at the last minute.

I've got lots of skeletons, zombies, ghosts, coffins, body parts, etc. so the themes that work best are probably things like crypts, caves, dungeons and such. But I would really like to hear any ideas about putting together something like that on a budget, and making it plenty scary, but without having to hang hundreds of feet of black plastic.

Any suggestions?

--Mitch Monster