Thread: Epitaph Revenge (need creative input)

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Okay, this is going to sound weird, but...

My oldest daughter has a science teacher that really aggrivates me. But rather than going into my daughter's school and punching this teacher in the throat, getting arrested in front of my daughter and her classmates, shaming my family with a court case, and eventually only seeing my wife and girls through plexiglass...I would like to "honor" him with a tombstone.

So, anyone out there have a good epitaph for a middle school science teacher pain-in-the-butt who has lost the magic of teaching and the inherent wonder and mystery of youth?

Here's an example I just came up with:

Here lies a teacher who couldn't care less.
His homework amounted to nothing but stress.

He lies here now, his bones are dust.
For he did not read the word combust!

I like the one you came up with.

Or what about:

His initials (and then below that)
Those who can, do.
Those who can't,
teach middle school science (badly).

LOL! I like it. Short and sweet!

If it helps, the teacher's name rhymes with RICE.

Ahhh, so it's not Mr.Norris than. that guy was a punk.

In this grave
Lies Mr.Rice,
Once alive
But now on ice.

I once knew a teacher, named mr.rice
He was a pain in the neck, to be precise.

I love this idea! I have a problem of my own only it involves a certain tire manufacturer(cough~Firestone~cough). Two inner sidewall blow-outs in 6 weeks nearly put US in a grave!
I'm gonna make sure and display the blown tire on halloween with their own little stone...lol!

MR.Rice
Last thing he said,
Everyone turn on there bunson burners;
Now light!

A flame shaped tombstone for firestone!

Here's a couple off the bat.

"Here lies the body of Mr Rice
He did not heed
this simple advice
teach the young ones
while you may
For with the worms
You soon must play"

or..

"Beneath this stone
Lies Mr Rice
A Science teacher,
none too nice.
"An apple for teacher"!
"How lovely" He said.
But the arsenic within it
Has made him quite dead.

Here lies Mr Rice
The meanest teacher we ever knew
The only thing we learned from him
Is that he's now turning into goo

Quite an ass, was Mr. Rice
A science teacher, none too nice
Now no one weeps, for he's erased
His life was just a total waste

You could always replace"ass" with somehting more...um...friendly?

-EEric