Thread: How do you handle Hellions?

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Just don't invite them. Kids are a direct reflection of their parents. If the parent truly cares, the kids behavior would not be out of line.

That said, I have no children and there for have very little tolerance for those who do and let them misbehave. Because of that I am not the best to give advice in this area, but love to give it anyway.

I split my Halloween fun into two nights. One night for the Adult ONLY Halloween party, and ToT. That way I don't have to baby sit as i get trashed and enjoy all the great costumes and fun with friends. I have only had one instance of a troublesome idiot child on ToT, with of course, no parental escort. And I did as was suggested above. Everything stopped, the house lights came on and the unruly child (about 14 I'd guess) was singled out and escorted off the property. He was expressly told not to return and if he did, trespassing charges and/or destruction of property charges would be filed. He tried to make a scene, but begrudgingly left. That was 5 years ago, and I never heard from him again.

I would either tell them straight out how I felt or just plain wouldn't invite them....I'll tell anyone this is my hobby and it's an expensive one....If I had the money back I have in Halloween, I could have a shiny Mustang and I'd be just as upset if their kids damaged that.....I don't think people understand the amount of money we soak into this stuff or appreciate the time it takes to put it all together.....If they can't appreciate and respect what I do then they don't need to be here, plain and simple........ZR

If they are good friends and you don't invite them, your friendship will suffer from your passive agressive non-invite. Not inviting them says they are not important and not considered worthy of an invite.

I would call or have a face to face conversation with your old friends well in advance of Halloween. I would mention your plans and say you consider them very good friends and want them to share in your efforts. I would say that your plans would not be condusive to (boys name) having the same freedom to do (list a couple examples) the things he did the last time he visited to make sure he was safe, the props stay safe and the other participants have a chance to thoroughly enjoy your efforts as well, and ask if they could keep a close eye on him.

If you feel you need to soften it a little, tell them you are overly concerned about boys in his age group getting into a little havoc because you've heard some terrible stories from forum members here and you are nervous about 11-16 year old boys in general. Tell them you have a ton of things to worry about so you are asking all the parents with the same age boys to keep an eye out for you.

If you have a lot of props I would find the time to give him a quick tour of everything and mention how much time, money, and effort everything requires. Ask him if he could help make sure everything stays safe. He would probably enjoy the responsibility and would be less likely to destroy anything himself.

Your decision might rely on how much you trust the boy's parents. Will they listen to your concerns and take the responsibility of supervising the boy? If you don't think so, and you're stressing over the situation, it might not be worth it to invite them. Whatever happens, define your boundaries and stick to them.

If this is going to be on the night of halloween, use ALL the kids as "scare-ers". We had a party at a friend's house and there were probably 10 to 15 kids there and we used them as "actors" in our halloween scene. From the standard "pop-out" people to having them come in costume and just walk immediately behind the TOTers to freak them out....

This isn't something you have to govern either...take one (older) kid that you trust and have them dish out scare assignments. Your involvement will be minimal, the kids will be entertained and the adults will get a little grown-up interaction time...its a win-win.

As for the chances that something goes wrong, it is YOUR place...if the kid is being an unruly douche and the parents won't fix it...toss him. Most parents will be truly embarassed of a kid that is misbehaving that badly and will offer to leave and take the bad apple with them.

Don't be shy, it's YOUR house, YOUR haunt and YOUR party...if they are being a PITA, get rid of them.

dK